Wednesday, July 10, 2024

Birds Do It, Bees Do It: How to Have the Love Life You Want

The good old birds and the bees conversation. Every child or adolescent hears it at some point. While you’re likely no longer speaking in metaphors, the topic of sex can still be uncomfortable.

No matter what side of the bed you fall on, communicating with your partner is essential for your relationship. Some of us want to hide in embarrassment whenever the word is mentioned. Others are open to talking about their sex life, behaviors, and even desires.

There’s no reason to hide from the topic of sex. It’s a natural part of life, and humankind is a product of sexual intercourse. It can be a tricky subject to handle with a romantic partner, whether they’re new or a longtime love. However, for your happiness, being honest is essential.


We’re here to help guide you as you start the conversation and communicate your needs and desires. These three tips can help you have the love life you want — and deserve.

1. Understand Your Why

Understanding you’re why can be a time of self-reflection. It’s a time for you to understand why you desire sex with your partner. Sex can be a way to show an emotional connection or sense of commitment to another. It can also be a way to relieve stress and enjoy yourself. Healthy sex can — and should — be a pleasurable experience for all parties involved.

Part of the why is understanding what you want out of the intercourse. Without protection, the end product of sex can be pregnancy. If you and your partner aren’t ready for that stage of life, you’ll need to be prepared. Fortunately, getting birth control online can be an easy, seamless experience in today’s world. Rest easy knowing you are fulfilling your — and your partner’s — desire to be intimate for the pleasurable experience alone.

When you figure out you’re why share it with your partner. This doesn’t have to happen all the time, but consider sharing why you’re feeling frisky. Communicating why you’re craving intimacy helps you and your partner engage in an honest conversation, and it can be flirtatious. This can be a powerful, intimate discussion for the two of you before you hop in between the sheets. You’ll feel better going after it knowing you’ve gotten everything off your chest.

2. Focus on Self-Love

This may seem backward, but loving yourself is key to loving your sex life. Self-love stems from self-compassion or the idea of being honest and true with ourselves in all aspects of life. It’s a loving, tender way to care for yourself and put your needs first. It’s all about prioritizing you and your well-being.

When you truly love yourself, you’ll be able to love others more authentically. Your heart will be open and your potential for true love will unfold. Let go of what doesn’t serve you and make choices that bless your body and mind. This in turn will benefit your love life.

Self-love starts by accepting and loving all aspects of your life including your physical appearance. Body image can be a massive block to loving your sex life. Research even shows that women with a positive body image have higher satisfaction sexually compared to those with a negative body image. Prioritize spending time with yourself and loving yourself, and you’ll feel better about your sex life.

3. Don’t Forget Quality Time

We’re all busy. Our lives are filled with jumping from one thing to the next. We multitask throughout the day only to find ourselves exhausted at night. However, to have the love life you truly want, you need to spend quality time with your partner.

Regardless of whether you are in a long-term relationship or not, quality time can benefit any relationship. Think about it. How do you feel when your partner spends time and energy planning a special night out? You’re likely appreciative and thankful that your partner did something for you.

Quality time doesn’t necessarily need to be a considerable expense. Find a movie you both want to watch and watch it together — no phones. Or get outside and go hiking together. The options are endless. Spending time with each other and finding out what each other likes and dislikes can lead to a more satisfying sex life for both partners.

The more you spend time with your partner, the more you will learn about them. Connection at its core will facilitate a more open, loving relationship and a more desirable sex life to boot.


Whether you are in a long-term relationship, dating, or married, healthy sex e is an esfor part of any romantic relationship. Being upfront about your desires can make intimacy with your partner more enjoyable. Plus, it can benefit your mental health.

Remembering to prioritize yourself and practice self-love can grow the relyouronship you have with others. And prioritizing quality time with your love interest can lead to a stronger connection and better s. After .all, we have to learn to love ourselves before we can genuinely love others—ex life.

Jenna D. Norton
Jenna D. Norton
Creator. Amateur thinker. Hipster-friendly reader. Award-winning internet fanatic. Zombie practitioner. Web ninja. Coffee aficionado. Spent childhood investing in frisbees for the government. Gifted in exporting race cars in Orlando, FL. Had a brief career short selling psoriasis in Ohio. Earned praise for getting my feet wet with human growth hormone in Minneapolis, MN. Spent several years creating marketing channels for banjos for farmers. Spent 2002-2010 merchandising karma for no pay.

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